I am just trying to explain what happened. I make no excuses. There is no excuse. Lilly, our very small weird cat is not a people person and mostly keeps to herself. She's 11. Since we brought Maxie home Lilly has really kept to herself more than usual and has been at times impossible to find. As a result, I hadn't really noticed her in a while. Tuesday night she actually came up to me like she wanted to be petted, which is very rare. We were watching part two of the remake of "The Andromeda Strain," so I wasn't paying much attention and reached down to pet her and my hand touched something unpleasant. I asked My Sweetie to pause the show and I picked her up to inspect her and it was BAD. Apparently she has been scratching herself to death. I felt so bad I can't even explain it. I guess the word for it is neglect. And there is no excuse for that. I took her to the vet this morning and I could feel the judgement coming off in waves but I deserved it. If she had been a child in a comparable state, I'm sure C.P.S. would have been called. To make matters worse, I was just dropping her off because I had to go do Meals on Wheels and had two other appointments, so they probably thought I was worse than horrible. Around 3:00 they called me and told me they thought she was allergic to fleas, we discussed what to do regarding the other cats. They had already treated Lilly with Capstar and we decided we needed to give it to the other cats. And try to de-flea the house. So after my bank appointment and hair appointment, I picked up Lilly and just set her in her case in my bedroom. Then we vacuumed the whole house and let the other two cats out of the cat room. Then we stripped the whole cat room of everything cloth or carpet and swept, vacuumed and cleaned it. Then we had to give the other two cats the Capstar pill (and if you've never pilled a cat, you should know, it's quite the adventure). Finally we let Lilly out, gave her some time and then gave her her first prednisone pill. She has to have THREE a day for three days then one a day. Although she's the most skittish, she was the easiest. Maybe some tiny part of her tiny brain knew she needed it. Anyway it was a horrible day and I feel horrible. I will pay more attention to my cats from now on no matter what else I have going on in my life. And if you think I am a terrible person or a terrible pet owner, I don't blame you - but I promise to do better.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
I Am a Very Bad Person
I am just trying to explain what happened. I make no excuses. There is no excuse. Lilly, our very small weird cat is not a people person and mostly keeps to herself. She's 11. Since we brought Maxie home Lilly has really kept to herself more than usual and has been at times impossible to find. As a result, I hadn't really noticed her in a while. Tuesday night she actually came up to me like she wanted to be petted, which is very rare. We were watching part two of the remake of "The Andromeda Strain," so I wasn't paying much attention and reached down to pet her and my hand touched something unpleasant. I asked My Sweetie to pause the show and I picked her up to inspect her and it was BAD. Apparently she has been scratching herself to death. I felt so bad I can't even explain it. I guess the word for it is neglect. And there is no excuse for that. I took her to the vet this morning and I could feel the judgement coming off in waves but I deserved it. If she had been a child in a comparable state, I'm sure C.P.S. would have been called. To make matters worse, I was just dropping her off because I had to go do Meals on Wheels and had two other appointments, so they probably thought I was worse than horrible. Around 3:00 they called me and told me they thought she was allergic to fleas, we discussed what to do regarding the other cats. They had already treated Lilly with Capstar and we decided we needed to give it to the other cats. And try to de-flea the house. So after my bank appointment and hair appointment, I picked up Lilly and just set her in her case in my bedroom. Then we vacuumed the whole house and let the other two cats out of the cat room. Then we stripped the whole cat room of everything cloth or carpet and swept, vacuumed and cleaned it. Then we had to give the other two cats the Capstar pill (and if you've never pilled a cat, you should know, it's quite the adventure). Finally we let Lilly out, gave her some time and then gave her her first prednisone pill. She has to have THREE a day for three days then one a day. Although she's the most skittish, she was the easiest. Maybe some tiny part of her tiny brain knew she needed it. Anyway it was a horrible day and I feel horrible. I will pay more attention to my cats from now on no matter what else I have going on in my life. And if you think I am a terrible person or a terrible pet owner, I don't blame you - but I promise to do better.
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18 comments:
I'm so sorry about Lilly. Thankfully she's gonna be okay. I don't think you're a bad person at all. My Snuggy is like Lilly, hard to find and not terribly interested in human love. There have been times that we cannot find him, no matter how hard we look for him and we still have no idea where he hides. It's crazy.
(sigh)
Incidentally, that's also how I feel about my fish. I mean, I know they're just fish, but it sucks when I lose one and I feel like I should have noticed something amiss.
Anyway, it sounds like you had a crazy, busy day. Hopefully things get better for Lilly.
(big hug)
Oh, and of course this happened just before your vacation, because that's always when something with your pets will happen. Always.
Jeanette,
~~Yes, and I feel bad that My Sweetie will have to pill Lilly while I'm away partying! I was going to do a post about the other things in my day but felt this was more important. Someone smashed that toilet that was on the curb and I took a picture, but I guess I'll post about that in a few days.
My first husband kept an aquarium and it was my daughter's first encounter with death when one of his cichlids died. (We actually kept the aquarium in her room and it also served as her nightlight.) We wrapped him in some pretty cloth, put him in one of those metal band-aid containers and buried him in the backyard. After we put the dirt on top, she asked, "Is that it?" I said, "Well some people sing a song now." So she sang "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star." I think she was somewhere between 2 and 3.
Well, Lilly knew to come to you for help so I wouldn't feel so bad about it. Glad she'll be okay. Are they all just house cats or are they allowed out?
Poor dear Lilly...! Hopefully you have de-flead your house now...! Sometimes it is hard to know that something is wrong, especially if they are hiders...Hopefully you will be more aware now that this occurred...I know I have over the years felt like I was a bad Cat-Mommy, from time to time....It is a great reminder to be watchful....!
I feel so bad for Lilly, but I know you'll do better. Life gets busy and cats seem to be so independent, it's understandable. Let us know how she's doing.
You sound like a wonderful, considerate and passionate pet owner to me! What is this talk about being neglectful??! The moment you saw what was happening you rushed her to the vet, got her diagnosed, got the medicine, administer it, cleaned everything that could have caused the situation and have strong feelings about the cat. That sounds like a pretty darn good cat owner to me!
(Remember that Dean Jones movie called That Darn Cat??! One of my favorite Disney movies of that era.)
Animals can come down with something pretty fast and the fact that your cat came to you tells me a lot. She knew you would do what was necessary to help her. Animals can be pretty smart - even if they are often independent much of the time!
Take care and congratulations on being such a wonderful pet owner - you really are and don't ever think for a moment otherwise!!
Geewits,
I completely agree with Russell! That could have happened overnight for all you know, and the fact that you felt so bad and rushed Lilly to get her taken care of shows you're a good cat mommy. Also, how many people have a whole cat room? You make your cats happy and comfortable and give them lots of love. You have no reason to feel bad, so don't beat yourself up anymore. Instead, keep focusing on the fun trip/adventure you're about to embark upon!
A couple of years ago, Scout also got fleas pretty bad, and our vet told us that all these squirrels in our neighborhood are badly flea infested, so we've kept Scout treated ever since. Now that he's so old and almost blind, the squirrels will sit on the fence and shake their flea infested tails right above him. Ack! Last week a squirrel actually walked all the way down the length of our fence right beside Scout, like they were friends or something! As Bill Cosby puts it, I guess Scout is an old dog now trying to get into doggie heaven. haha Of course Bill says that about people, not dogs.
That story about your daughter singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star is precious.
Oh Geewits, you poor thing. I know the feeling. I felt the same way when my cat had a bladder infection and I didn't know. I kept blaming myself. But Lilly did the right thing, she came to you when it was time. How are you supposed to know she's allergic to fleas?
I remember "the look" that vets have perfected to make us feel inadequate. My dog used to get his glands infected every few years or so. Which was totally unusual for a large dog. And wouldn't you know, it was always before I was heading out on vacation. So the sitter had the enviable task of taking care of his bum :( But man, the looks and comments I got from various vet clinics...
It was suprisingly easy to give pills to Missy. She's an old lady that doesn't like to be disturbed but she was very easily cornered for the pill, I guess I had plenty of training with the dog prior to having her.
You did everything you could and now you have to let nature take its course. Your hubby will take good care of Lilly and the others.
I know it's hard but you are a good owner, you give them a loving home, plenty of space to be happy and they know it. That photo is lovely too.
Totally in agreement with everyone else. Poor Lilly, but she came to you for help and you helped her. The one cat we ever had would scratch at herself all the time and nothing seemed to help - it then progressed to the point where she was totally bald underneath. But I think there's so much more that can be done these days for animals in distress. She will be fine!
Here's a trick someone told me about years ago. Scout loves peanut butter, so I can give him any pill he needs to take in a spoon of peanut butter. It sticks to his mouth some, so he can't spit the pill out like he use to with anything else I use to try to sneak a pill into. I don't know if that would work with cats or not? I guess it depends on whether or not they like peanut butter. Scout and I share peanut butter crackers all the time! :)
LGS,
~~They are indoor only. The cat we just got from my Mom was an indoor/outdoor, but she treated him with Frontline before she gave him to us. I think it was Barney, the cat we found outside, that originally introduced fleas into the house. However they got in, I hate it!
Naomi,
~~Yes, I will be more vigilant from now on, that's for sure.
Scarlet,
~~I think she's getting a little buzz from the prednisone. She seems very content.
Russell,
~~I plan to feel bad until she gets better. Years ago, we watched That Darn Cat and Jake, our old orange tabby, watched the whole movie and went crazy when the cat was drinking from a saucer of milk. It was the funniest thing to watch! Thanks for reminding me of that.
Carole,
~~I've noticed the squirrels getting bolder, too. There is one that likes to gnaw on my fence and I moved up to him and yelled at him to stop. He stopped, looked at me and resumed chewing!
HD,
~~Yes, pets are not like children and can let you know what's wrong right away. I imagine vets hate all pet owners because they only see us when something is wrong. Well except for the spaying/neutering - then they like us.
Leslie,
~~And didn't it look terrible!? Yikes.
Carole,
~~I think with a cat, maybe cream cheese would work, but it's not been that hard. I had a little trouble with the first pill today because I had not had any beer, so I was pretty tense and as I was trying to get her wrapped back up in the towel for my second attempt, Barney scratched my hand! I think I will take Lilly into a separate room for the next pill.
I think you're a lovely person and a very good pet owner because your tale shows you really care. I think you should give her the blog to read then she will realize how contrite you are.
As long as you're being eaten up with guilt you know you're a good mother/pet owner.
Ian,
~~She's old school and would rather read the paper than go online.
Xup,
~~Interesting perspective. It has made me think.
Well, as everyone else has said, I also don't think you should feel guilty. You are not neglectful of a cat who hides from you. And I agree with XUP - if you weren't a good pet mother you'd feel less guilt and more anger at the cat who brought in the fleas. I can't sense any of that in what you wrote.
Violetsky
~~It never occurred to me to feel anything other than huge remorse and guilt. She has been getting her pills and lots of loving. Thanks for stopping by.
Don't be so hard on yourself Geewits. Someone has probably already said this, but it's usually really hard to know what's going on with a cat. And when that cat isn't very people minded it's that much worse. You know what's wrong and she'll be ok, that's the important thing.
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