Wednesday, September 05, 2007

Barney's Big Day & How Oprah Saved My Life

Barney likes to sleep with his head hanging off of stuff.
(Does anyone recognize the blog on my screen?)

Tomorrow after Meals on Wheels, I'll take Barney on his first trip to the veterinarian. I can't wait to find out what his age is (or is near). He will get his shots (ick!) and we will make an appointment to get him neutered. I was worried about getting him into the cat carrier because of the way he acted in the trap when we caught him, but it has been sitting out for about 8 hours now and he has gone into it many times. At one point Barney and Rufus were fighting over who could go in the carrier.

Bill Clinton was on Oprah today talking about his new book Giving. It's the message that Oprah has been espousing for years - that EVERYONE can do SOMETHING. Oprah brought out "the little girl" that inspired her to start the Angel Network. I put that in quotation marks because the girl is now a senior at Princeton. It all seemed so surreal, because there we all were, living proof that giving and inspiring is somehow infectious. I say WE, because it was Oprah that inspired me to do Meals on Wheels 7 years ago.

After my Dad died in October of 1998, I began to go downhill. In January of 1999, I called my service (I was freelancing and got my assignments through a company that specialized in Graphic Arts) and told them to take me off their list and that I would call them when I was ready to come back to work. My anxiety disorder was now worse than ever and I just did not want to leave the house. My daughter always spent the summers with her dad and we had a grocery delivery service, so after school let out that year, I didn't have to go out at all. And so I didn't. At some point that summer, I was watching Oprah and she very emphatically stated that EVERYONE can do SOMETHING and I started crying and thinking, "But what can I do?" I thought about it constantly for the next few days and came up with the idea of Meals on Wheels because it is very solitary and then one-on-one with the sweet (most of them) old people. The problem was going to be getting started.

I called MOW and explained to them as well as I could that I wanted to help, but that I couldn't possibly sit in with a group for orientation. The lady was very kind and agreed to give me a private orientation. I still had to go to their office, but she arranged for me to come late in the afternoon as things were winding down. I was a little paranoid and imagined she would look at me funny, but it was all very nice and I thanked her profusely for the extra effort. (I've made jokes that I can never quit MOW because I would have to go back to the office to turn in my ice chests.) Now I've been doing this for 7 years and it's because of Oprah. Sometimes when people have asked "Why do you do Meals on Wheels?" I say, "Oprah told me to." Of course, my favorite question was from a little old man. I had been delivering food to him and his wife for almost a year and then one day he asked, "Do you do this as a volunteer or is this some kind of community service?" It was SO hard not to laugh. I hope they don't let people doing community service do Meals on Wheels!

MOW is also how I finally got on the right medication. A few years ago, I finished my route and was all panicky and decided to just go straight home instead of going out for lunch. It started to happen more often and I started having thoughts of quitting MOW altogether. In the mornings driving to the church I would think, "I can't do this anymore." I really didn't want to quit and become housebound again, so I called my doctor and said, "We have to fix this." And finally we did. Thanks, Oprah!

8 comments:

Jo said...

Geewits, you have no idea how much guts you have. You didn't let your anxiety disorder ruin your life. Several years ago, after my husband died, my father died, my friend died, my mother died, I folded up and went into a deep depression, and along with it came anxiety disorder. It lasted for a year, and no one was able to fix it. My daughter, unfortunately, became really impatient with it, and to this day she calls me "friggin' crazy." I managed to pull myself out of it, but it was very difficult. I guess we all have to be a little "friggin' crazy" to be sane. Does that make any sense? We're only human, and these things happen to us, and that means we're normal.

I think your Meals on Wheels work is incredible, under the circumstances. It must have taken such determination for you to take that first step, and you have never given up.

Here's to Oprah, and here's to all the "friggin' crazy" people. I have the feeling we are in good company.

geewits said...

Josie,
Thanks for a great comment. My Mom hates the whole thing. My daughter came around over time. I actually call the pill I take twice a day my "crazy pill." Except in front of my Mom. Then it's "my medicine." MOW was tough for a while. I almost quit about 50 times, but I kept saying "I'll do it ONE MORE time and then if it's too much, I'll quit." I'm glad I never did.

Leslie: said...

Kudos to you for sticking with it AND finding the courage to admit you needed help. We all need help sometimes in our lives and I'm certainly one who did. I also take my "crazy" pill once a day and it keeps me level and free from that nonsensical fear.

Scarlet said...

In many ways you're someone else's "Oprah."

geewits said...

Leslie,
And don't we loathe the nonsensical fear?

Scarlet,
What an interesting thing to say. I'll take it as a great compliment.

Tai said...

That's wonderful that the thing that helps others, helps you!

geewits said...

Tai,
Good point.

OldLady Of The Hills said...

First of all...I read your newest post and I congratulate you on your deciaion to quit smoking. As an EX Smoker...now 37 years smoke free, in early November...I know how hard it is to stop...I had smoked for 24 years, so I was HOOKED! I think sometmes it takes something quite frightening like what happened to you, to allow you to truly turn that corner...BRAVO!

And, I saw that Oprah show with Bill Clinton the other day, too...And I thought it was fabulous. He is soooo right about that concept and of course, so is Oprah...I LOVED reading about Oprah being your inspiration and what you had to overcome to do the MOW....I told you I think your doing that is fantastic and so beeded by so very many. BRAVO to that, as well. Your are absolutely an inspiration to many, I'm sure!