Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Fitting Together

I have a friend who's in a terrible marriage. She always says things to me like, "You're so lucky. I wish [My Sweetie] had a brother." And "Are you sure there's not another [My Sweetie] out there?" The thing is, just because My Sweetie is so great for me does not mean he would be great for her. I really do believe that people are like puzzle pieces. When you connect with people it's like fitting interlocking puzzle pieces together. And in another way it's like music.
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One old friend and I reconnected on facebook and I care about him alot. When I was in N.C. when my father died, I called him in Florida and he drove straight up and seemed just as shocked and sad as I was. He and Dad had gotten very close after he returned to N.C. after being in the army. But it's so odd when we talk on the phone. It's like I'm playing classical clarinet and he's playing heavy metal bass. There's no natural flow and it's always jarring. We have awkward pauses or step on each other's sentences. That's really weird to me.
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I think when you have a really good fit with someone, whether it's your mate, child, parent or friend, everything flows in a natural way. I guess that's why the word "harmony" is used for both relationships and music.
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You always hear people say things like, "We can go ten years without seeing each other and when we get together it's like we've never been apart." Now, that's flow. My husband I and have a "good flow." We are very different and yet seem to think of the same things at the same time. I have that with several people. We "get" each other and seem to be playing complimentary instruments in a well written duet.
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I like that. I also like my friend that seems to be in a completely different orchestra. I wonder what's going on there? Oh well, I do like a mystery.

7 comments:

Jazz said...

Ah yes, flow is good. I love flow.

And I love the pic of Barney with the plaster cat. They look like they've got flow...

XUP said...

I think the key is that people "get" each other.It's a small phrase but a huge concept. For someone to laugh at the same things as you do; for someone to think of the same response/comment to something or someone as you; for someone to understand what you're feeling or thinking without you having to spend hours explaining; and for someone to be actually interested in what's up with you -- all part of "getting" someone. You can't have a relationship or friendship even without that for sure.

geewits said...

Jazz,
~~You are a good example. You were the first blogger I ever met and I thought we had good flow. You really spoiled me for meeting other bloggers!

Xup,
~~Great insight!

OldOldLady Of The Hills said...

Ahhhh yes....Flow and Harmony. Not always easy to find, but when you do...It is wonderful!

XUP said...

That's a good recommendation, Geewits! I'm meeting her next weekend. I shall hold you responsible if she's a total nutter.

geewits said...

Naomi,
~~It really is.

Xup,
~~You will be surprised. Pleasantly surprised.

XUP said...

Well she's bringing bagels so that's a great start