This afternoon I walked out to smoke and I was standing there enjoying my Camel Light and I thought, "Where was I? What was I just doing?" My brain felt woobly and floogly.
Then I remembered that I had just spent 10 minutes of my life reading some entertainment website's comments on something to do with "American Idol":
And then I realized that reading those comments, which were either from brain-stunted 13 year olds or people from foreign countries who hate us and want to kill our heads, felt just like when you are partying with a friend and they talk you into taking several shots of tequila or some sort of schnapps or something and you kinda start to wake back up and think, "Why did I do that? What's wrong with me?" And you are filled with crushing remorse about all the damage you just did to your brain.