I decided to resume keeping up with my spoonerisms and other general word flubby things and I had two last week within just a few days. One was a word switch/mix up and the other one was really weird, where I totally reordered the sounds of a word. That one cracked me up. I think I laughed for five minutes.
I had done something goofy and My Sweetie was teasing me and then he started laughing. I said, "Hey! Now you're laughing at me. That's just putting wound in the salve!" I meant "salt in the wound" but it went all awry somewhere between my brain and my mouth.
Friday after lunch, I was sitting at the bar doing my crossword puzzle. 26 across was "----RED" and the clue was "like some college professors." I thought, "Oh, that's easy! NEUTERED!"
(I'm assuming you all knew the word was "tenured.")