Wednesday, December 09, 2009

Things You Learn From Marriage

Today was my daughter's fiance's 26th birthday. He thought he was old. heh heh heh. We met for drinks near my house and had a nice evening. Old? I should have said, "Old people do not wear a T-shirt when it is 37°."
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So I was thinking the other day about my marriages. Not a whole lot of people have been married three times. (Except Ian.) I feel guilty about it sometimes because I was the one that left each time and I guess it's the guilt that makes me constantly try to analyze all that stuff. On the one hand, I do have a strong belief in fate and think it was all meant to be. Also I learned things from both guys that are part of who I am. I imagine all they got from it was "how to avoid certain types of women". Except my second husband, who I imagine should have figured out that he wanted to avoid women from the get go.
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My first husband was raised on a ranch in Oklahoma and he was Mr. Fix It. That's how I learned all my home repair stuff. He's an electrical engineer, but his personality was more farm hand/handyman, than laboratory. My second husband is also an electrical engineer but he was more of a deep philosophical thinker. From him I learned about politics, astronomy and the scientific method. He also taught me critical thinking, although we never used that term. I guess it's part of the scientific process.
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That was a joke earlier about what they learned from me. I believe my first husband learned that women are not to be treated like servants and second class citizens because he ended up marrying one tough cookie and they have been together for quite some time. My second husband learned to be himself and not live for the approval of his parents although I am not sure if he has "come out" with that or not.
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As for my current husband, My Sweetie, I am sure we have taught each other various things but mostly we have learned how to make each other laugh and I think that's the best thing of all.

9 comments:

Big Brother said...

Amen to that, when you stop laughing together things are not going well.

VioletSky said...

with a face like that, you gotta laugh!

XUP said...

Absolutely. There is nothing more attractive, in my opinion, than someone who shares a sense of humour with yours.

Jazz said...

If you can't laugh together, what's the point? BB got in my head again.

Mr. Jazz said...

Robert Plant said it best in the live version of Stairway to Heaven in the epic The Song Remains the Same: "Does anybody remember laughter?" And the crowd (and the forests) echoed in laughter.

Carole said...

Gee, I know how much you like the phrase "live, love, laugh"...well I think there should definitely be another L added onto that phrase. Live, Love, Laugh, Learn! You have done/and do all four, and that makes for a very special person in you.

geewits said...

BB,
~~I bet that is true.

Violet Sky,
~~Hey! He wants to be anonymous, what can I do?

Xup,
~~I believe that too.

Jazz,
~~Well I've known couples that didn't laugh together or even like each other but stayed together for the physical aspect. That's weird to me.

Mr. Jazz,
~~If a tree laughs in the forest and there is no one there to hear it was it really laughing?

Carole,
~~Thanks! And I like that: the FOUR L's instead of the three.

OldOldLady Of The Hills said...

Sometimes you have to go through a number of marriages or 'reltionships' to finally get it right...Though, on the other hand, there are some people that keep marrying the same person, so to speak, and they just stay in that kind of 'fit', if you know what I mean.
The very first couple I mattied..Offictated at the Wedding, that is, was in 1986 and after about twenty years she said to me..."We're Lifers. He makes me laugh!" I think that may be the most important componant of a successful narriage.

geewits said...

Naomi,
~~And the fact that someone works to make you laugh means they love you. That's what I believe anyway.