Thursday, December 03, 2009

The Precognizant Restaurant Hostess

I've been having a lot of OUT days lately. It may not register to anyone that reads here how many IN days that I have because I mostly post about the OUT days. I mean, what sort of blog would it be to say, "I stayed home again today." Heck I could post more often if I were going to do just that.
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Monday morning I woke up really early for me. It was 10:15. I was lying in bed and thought, "Since it's so early and I have some errands to run, I think I'll go out for lunch." And I did. Of course my lunch time is 1:30 so I had plenty of time. Normally (ha ha! that word doesn't really fit me!) I can't seem to get out of the house before 3:00 unless there is some hideous ungodly reason there is something I really have to do.

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So I stopped by the QT (a local convenience store) and grabbed a "USA Today" and went for some Mexican food at On The Border. I tried a new menu item that was crazy messy yet delicious and headed out to run my errands. As I got to the door, the hostess yelled at me, "Watch out for the bench!!" I was all, whaa..aaa? She explained, "We just put that bench there and I'm afraid someone will walk into it." It was on my right and I just shrugged and thought, "What the hell? Anyone can see that. Who's going to walk into that bench?"
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Tuesday morning the phone rang and it was Meals On Wheels asking me to sub for a route. Although they called at 8:15 am, and I had gone to bed at 5:00 am, I said okay. Then I turned my alarm on, which is set for 8:44 and went back to sleep. I then pushed the snooze button about 18 billion times until around 9:30.
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I had only picked up food at this location, a library, once before. I had gone in one door and saw another guy go out a door that was closer and so had gone out that door. Well Tuesday morning I tried to go IN that door and it was locked, so with my arms full of the containers for transporting the food, I walked around to the door I had gone in the first time and as I rounded the corner my right knee smacked right into A BENCH. Smacked into it in a bad way. My first instinct was to drop everything, lay down, curl up in a ball, and call for my mommy. But after the stars and swirls and little birdies that were swimming around my head subsided I bucked up and kept walking into the library. Then I remembered the restaurant hostess yelling, "Watch out for the bench!"

7 comments:

XUP said...

OooOOoooOOOoo...spooky... I hope you did no serious damage to your knee? Will there be photos as the colours develop?

Jazz said...

Dude, always watch out for the bench...

ticknart said...

So, have you gotten a new regular route for MOW yet? I don't think you've written about it for a while.

Or am I just remembering thing wrong (and also being too lazy to check you past posts)?

Carole said...

Gee, you have your parallels in life, but this one sounds more like a perpendicular. Ouchies! If the hostess had only told you, "oh, and by the way, I'm psychic". Or...was she psychic, or were you simply a "day out of time", and that message was really meant for you the next day? Hmmmm.....

Big Brother said...

It was the same bench waiting to pounce on you since it missed the first time. ;o)

geewits said...

Xup,
~~There's a little egg there and it is very sore, but no good colours to report.

Jazz,
~~No kidding! Now I'm being careful just walking thru doorways in my house.

Ticknart,
~~I'll be a sub over here until a route opens up.

Carole,
~~If some powerful force was trying to help me, it didn't work.

Big Brother,
~~If that's true, it's a pretty smart bench (the library) and has good taste (Mexican food).

mrwriteon said...

Loved the card. Sorry about the bench. Ouch! That must have really hurt.