Friday Goofy

The puppy was an unwilling partner in the love affair of Walter and the Pink Pig.

How Gross Is This?

That's the door to the ladies' room at the Movie Tavern. I imagine all that goo is from the "buttered" popcorn. Yuck.
I used my foot to open the door.

No Hello for the Living

I was thinking about something sad today. A few years ago when we had the big scare with my father-in law, his daughters showed up and were frequent visitors. I haven't seen them since.
~
See, my FIL is actually my husband's stepDad. He has three daughters from his first marriage. I've met them a few times but couldn't pick them out of a line-up. They are never over there on his birthday or father's day. I know this because we usually are. I've only seen them around the Christmas holidays one time and my 27 year old daughter was still in high school. So that's been a while.
~
I wonder why it is that when it comes to old people, everyone makes time for goodbye, but no one ever bothers with hello.

Wishing and Looking Ahead

Dave, one of my facebook buddies, posted that picture today and it was like salve for my brain. I think we are on 30 days this year of triple digits and 23 days in a row of triple digits with this whole next week expected to be in, guess? Yes! Triple digits! We are stilll not real close to the record year of 1980. I think that was 60 days of triple digits and and 13 days of over 110°. The funny thing about that is that was the year I worked as a groundskeeper at my parents' country club. And I had to wear long pants every day except Monday. I guess when I was nineteen, I was much hardier.
~
I do have a mental exercise to keep cool. I have booked a trip for October to spend four days with Mom. When I think about the trip I think things like:
1. I bet I'll have to wear jeans
2. I bet I can wear my hair down
3. I may even need a jacket
These are very refreshing thoughts. Just imagining being chilly is nice. In the meantime, I can always look at Dave's picture.

Heat Ennui

I'm pretty much reverse hibernating. It's too hot to do anything. I go to the grocery store on Tuesday, do Meals on Wheels on Friday and we usually do something simple on either Saturday or Sunday. Other than that, not so much. I guess I'll start reading my third autobiography soon. It's the Keith Richards one and has gotten great reviews. I hope he tells some stories about being freezing cold. I can't even remember what that is like.

Surprise!

We went to see Horrible Bosses at The Movie Tavern tonight (Sunday night I mean). I ordered an individual sausage and bell pepper pizza. It was delicious. There was a foil packet tucked in one side between a slice and the pan. It's dark in the Movie Tavern, because, you know, we are all watching a movie. I assumed it was a wet-nap. So after I had eaten all I wanted to eat, I thought, "Ooh that wet-nap was a good idea. I'm going to use that." I figured that was way more convenient than digging through my purse for my hand sanitizer. So I grabbed the packet, ripped it open and poured aged parmesan cheese all over myself. My Sweetie thought it was hilarious. The movie was funny too.

Friday Goofy

............Granny didn't get this far by not knowing how to take advantage of a situation............

And It Was Good!

When I was 5 or 6 my mother was in a bowling league and all the children at the bowling alley were allowed to run around like a pack of wild dogs. I remember playing the juke box and dancing and I remember exploring the back rooms. One time in one of those back rooms, maybe the ladies' locker room, my brother dared to me to touch two electrical wires at the same time. They were sticking out of what had probably been an outlet but was just an open place in the cinder block wall. Being 5 or 6 and not knowing any better I of course grabbed the wires and was thrown backwards by a horrible electric shock. I'm surprised I didn't have a pants accident.
~
As all childhood traumas are wont to do, that particular experience gave me a lifelong fear of electricity. Well today, I conquered that fear. I installed a new light fixture in my laundry room:

I did a previous post about the light fixture being some sort of idiotic halogen bulb and how hard it was to replace and that I had bought a new fixture, but in that post I also said I was going to have an electrician replace it for me. Well the first guy came down with a case of mononucleosis and so I called another guy and they kept forgetting about me. So today (Monday I mean) I decided to do it myself.

~

After removing the old fixture there was a black wire and a white wire sticking out and I made myself touch them. Not at the same time like when I was 5 or 6. I would stand at the top of the step stool and look at them and then go have a beer and then stand at the top of the step stool and look at them and then go have another beer until I had finally worked up my nerve. I got back up there and quickly tapped my right index finger against the black wire. Nothing happened. I was so relieved. But I did go have one more beer before I touched the white wire.

~

Once I realized I would not be shocked, I quickly did all the simple steps and had a new light fixture that uses a regular bulb. I was so tickled. Not that I had a new light fixture and not that I had saved $75. I was tickled because I had done it myself. Myself! I had conquered my lifelong fear and touched those wires. I said, "Let there be light!" I flipped the switch. It came on. And it was good.

The Help

I read The Help recently and found it very interesting. It is set in Mississippi in the early 60's and explores the relationships between white families and their black maids. We had a black maid named Bessie in the mid 60's. She took care of me while my mother slept because my mother worked nights. I think she also cleaned and prepared lunch and dinner. I have very few memories of her because I was a toddler. But I do remember sitting with her on the front porch. Bessie was eating lettuce. She would shake salt between each bite from the lettuce leaf. I remember that I asked her why she was salting the lettuce and she said it tasted good. I asked to try it, and I liked it. That's my only real memory of her. I guess my mother moved to the day shift and I was put in daycare. Plus we moved across town.
~
For Mother's Day, one of the gifts I got from my daughter was a coupon good for "A Movie Night Out." So last week, I gave my daughter the book and said, "Read this book and then I am cashing in my coupon for the movie night on August 15th for the movie." The movie opens August 12th and her husband is going to be out of town then anyway, so I figured that's a good time to go. I hope they do a good job with the movie. I'm looking forward to it. And also to a fun night out with my daughter.

Friday Goofy

Walter, though amused by the puppy's antics, did not make note of it in his journal that day.

More Uses For The Internet

I just read an old novel from 1971 that was set in Bergen, Norway. So to get the feel of the place I went to Google Earth to look around. Also some important scenes are set around the Stavkirke of Fantoft. It was described in such a way that I couldn't quite picture it, but I could look it up and there it was (pictured above). I also was able to see what a funicular looked like.
~
I first did this years ago when I read The DaVinci Code. Every time a painting was described, I would look it up to see for myself. Maybe it's because my brain is like that of a small child, but it's kind of nice to have pictures to go with my stories.

July? .... Really?

I'm really not sure what happened to June. June was busting out all over and then boom! it was gone. I am very proud of myself for making it through June without going on and on about the heat. I made a vow not to do that this summer. Well, I made a vow not to go on and on about the heat on my blog. I inflict that crap on my facebook friends now.
~
I ran out today and bought hanging metal stars for my Meals on Wheels peeps. I gave them festive flags last year. I thought these were cute.:

I just realized that you can't tell from the picture but they are not flat. Anyway, one thing I've learned about old people is they are very patriotic, so I think they will like these. Speaking of old people, now that I am an old person, I decided to do something weird. Well, weird for me. Gnightgirl posted this pic a little bit ago:

I've never had a pedicure in my life and I don't think I've painted my toenails in years. I figured it just draws attention to my Fred Flintstone feet. But after seeing that picture, I called my daughter, the pedicure queen, and asked if she would take me to her place to get my toenails painted funny for 4th of July. So we are going on Saturday. Kate says they don't speak English well, and suggested I bring that picture, so I guess my toenails will look just like that. I wish the rest of my feet did. Happy July!

Crazy Maragarita

I ordered the Dos Equis Margarita because a bartender years ago told me the secret to a smooth margarita was to add beer. I had no idea they put the whole bottle in there. Literally. But man, is it delicious.

Work, Work, Work It Out Baby

I'm not a huge fan of having workmen in my house, but I have a lot of stuff on the burner for this week. See this bizarro lightbulb?:
Well that's the lightbulb in our laundry room. And the brownish parts? Those are the holders of the glass part that I have removed and they look to me like they are burning up or something. Anyway, I decided that A) this weird lightbulb sucks and B) That's all I need to know. So I bought a simple basic light fixture that uses a normal lightbulb like you can find on Earth and won't break in your hand and make you bleed when you are trying to replace it. I mean seriously, what the hell? That's the most idiotic thing ever. For a laundry room, anyway.
~
Also we are getting a new air conditioning unit in about 7 or 8 hours and a roofing guy is coming this week to replace a skylight and shore up a section of gutter. All of this is exhausting my brain. I'm going to go to sleep now and deal with all of this la........

Bobkitties!!

How freaking cute are these bobcat kitties? My friend and neighbor Carole went down to the other neighbor's house and captured these little darlings enjoying some fresh rain water. They think they are at least 10 weeks old, so when I saw Timber the bobcat, she must have been out foraging for food for nursing her tiny kits.

~

For those who asked, our local animal control does not interfere with these animals. They are considered just part of the local fauna. They really are cute!

It's A Girl!

Timber the bobcat is a female. She had kittens. She had kittens in the backyard, four houses down on my street. That neighbor believes they were born under her deck. We're guessing Timber went off to forage and the babies decided to come out and play. That lady was a little freaked out. I don't know that neighbor, but she called Carole. I am hoping some pictures will get passed my way. I've never seen baby bobkittens. If they are still there tomorrow, I may try to go down and see them. If not, hopefully I will get pictures to share.

Now It All Makes Sense

After being diagnosed with osteoarthritis in my right thumb a while back, I would sometimes look it up and think about it, but maybe I wasn't really paying attention until recently. The other day it was like a lightbulb bloomed over my head like in a cartoon.
~
The real reason I didn't see it at first is because I guess it's a normal function to not see one's self as defective. I kept seeing phrases like: Some people are born with abnormally formed joints... and of course, I thought: Well, that doesn't apply to me. I mean, really, who goes around thinking they were born with abnormal parts? And besides, the primary cause of osteoarthritis is aging. And I was aging. So obviously, I wasn't defective or abnormal, right?
~
You know how in thriller movies, when the protagonist stumbles upon something and then you get a flashback of a bunch of scenes and you can see that they are putting all the pieces of the puzzle together? It was just like that for me. I remembered that I had my friend Cathy write my daily paragraphs in first grade because it hurt my hand. I remembered all the times I asked teachers if I could type my paper instead of writing it. I remembered how I hated having to do scissor work and how bad scissors hurt my hand. I remembered showing off my "funny double-jointed thumb." It was pretty much just like in the movies as this wave of memories of my whole life and how I avoided things like that washed through my head.
~
So I have accepted that I was born defective. My thumbs were not properly aligned. I was a cute baby girl with defective thumbs. Doing normal things like writing, using scissors and using a screwdriver are painful but the good news is, it has nothing to do with getting old. I'm okay with that.

I Still Miss Him

Happy Father's Day

Subliminal Advertising

When I was 19 or so I dated a guy for a short while that was a very good artist. He was also a marketing major working on his thesis about subliminal advertising and tricks of the trade. Although his paper was all about Playboy Magazine, he also had lots of other stuff to show me. The Playboy stuff was fascinating - there was a lot involved and it would take me showing you old Playboys to explain it all. This was probably 1980 or so, and I haven't seen a Playboy in years, so I don't know if they still use those old tricks.
~
I still look at ads with a keen eye. The picture above is the new Louis Vuitton ad. The artists have totally reproduced the female anatomy in the crotch of her pants. I was amazed when I saw it and am surprised no one online has mentioned it. Maybe because it's supposed to be subliminal. Maybe everyone else is looking at her eyes. But if you look there, it's pretty obvious.

Much Better!

Apparently a little daylight seeping in helped tremendously with getting the color to photograph correctly. Carole came over and we tested the surge strip. She was very brave and plugged in the fan. The whole surge strip is dead. It was a poor design and the plug slots are all spaced so that I may have plugged into two different sockets. I'll have to get a nice new modern one for over there.

~

The paint color is named "Sahara Sands." It has a slight peach tinge to it. Now I can't wait to get a new countertop and sinks. We are going to go to a granite place a week from this Saturday. I wanted to go this weekend but it's Father's Day weekend and I don't want to go out three days in a row. I've lived with that horrible countertop for 10 years so I think I can wait one more week to go looking. And now I think I shall go to sleep.