You Can't Make This Stuff Up

I kinda glossed over the Wednesday night of January 3rd in my January 5th post, but something funny/annoying happened. What happened was, my daughter, who knew better, accidentally left the guest bathroom door opened. Rufus, our crazy cat, took that opportunity to roll an entire roll of toilet paper into the toilet. I DID mention that we had spent most of the evening at a bar so we were a little slow. When I discovered the toilet paper mess, I yelled for Kate and told her, "Look what you did!" We both stood there for a few minutes trying to figure out what to do. Finally I said, "Okay, we can't flush that much toilet paper. I'll get you some latex gloves. You can pull it out and put it into some double-bagged Target bags and I'll take it outside." So that's what we did.

I have a friend I'll call "Z." We do not spend a lot of time together as she has a young active family and works full time. And she doesn't drink - which is my full-time hobby. She lives on the other side of the metroplex, but we do spend a lot of time on the phone because of her insomnia (and I'm always up at night). Z called Monday night to tell me she had a conference on Tuesday on this side of town and would have a 1 and 1/2 hour break for lunch. She asked if I would be up (as in awake) for her to come over and hang out. I told her to call me when she was free and ready to come over. I got up and we were having a good ole visit when I noticed the bathroom door was open. I ran in and caught Rufus red-handed (black-pawed?) perched on the toilet and rolling the toilet paper into the toilet. I said, "Oh, Z, you left the bathroom door open!"

Z came into the bathroom and saw the reason for my distress. She immediately said, "Well give me some gloves and a grocery sack and I'll fish that out." I was VERY impressed and told her that's exactly what we did when my daughter left the door open. (I should have told her that she came up with the idea much faster than I did. But she doesn't drink so it makes sense.) Anyway, she took care of it, we laughed about it and a little bit later it was time for her to leave. About 20 minutes later she called and asked if her wedding ring had been left on my bathroom counter. I looked, told her, "Yes," and she said she would be by some time this week to retrieve her ring.

Today (Saturday) Z called. She said, "I'm on my way over. Don't be surprised if (my husband) calls. He doesn't believe my story." I was all ??????? Apparently, he didn't buy the cat/toilet paper story and thought . . . Hell, who knows what he thought (or thinks) but he thought she was lying. I'm still flabbergasted, shocked, surprised, flummoxed and just generally confused about the whole thing. He thought she was lying? WTF! YOU CAN'T MAKE THIS STUFF UP!!