I can't think of the name of the online dating service - it's not match.com - but I remember when their commercials first aired. They claimed they had some comprehensive questionnaire with like a billion questions to help people find their perfect mate. I remember one of the "questions" floating by. It wasn't a question but a statement that I suppose the respondent would rate on a scale. The statement was "I find humor in everything." If the scale was 1 (least) and 10 (most), who on earth would click the 10? What a stupid "question!" I sincerely hopes no one finds humor in war, famine and disease. It should have been: "I try to find the humor in most situations" or something like that.
Another one that bothers me is "If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the problem." Well that's not true. Let's say I'm in a room with a bunch of astrophysicists and they are trying to figure out how to land a craft on Enceladus (an active moon of Saturn). I obviously would not be part of the solution, but in no way shape or form could I be considered part of the problem.
Very close to that one is "Either you're with us or you're against us." Not true. Maybe I just don't care. An example here would be: There is a town that is 1000 miles away. An alligator is found in a pond. Half the town wants it killed, the other half wants it to live. I wouldn't be with or against either faction. I really wouldn't care.
Size Matters: I have a severe freakatude about spiders. If I see a large spider I will actually speak in tongues and do odd dances (convulsions). I saw a spider tonight and I actually felt my brain do some sort of calculation and decide that THAT spider was too small to freak out about. I have absolutely no idea what the criteria is for spider size. I guess some strange part of my brain decides on its own. If a spider is REALLY tiny, I will actually mash it with my finger, but I can't even be in the same room with a large spider. I wonder how that works?
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It's not only all relative but it's species oriented, too. Wading in tidal flats you can see crabs the size of dinner plates, and all you think is a meal with lots of garlic butter. But, crabs are quite spider-like in appearance. What if you ran across a spider the same size? I think I would realize in an instant I wasn't as continent as I thought I was.
Ian
Ian, if I were wading in tidal flats and saw a crab the size of a dinner plate, I would be about two blocks away inside of 3 minutes. Yes, crabs are tasty, but they scare the hell out of me. For the record, I am also afraid of squirrels and ducks. And pigeons....well, pretty much everything except cats and wasps.
Cool, your new avatar :)
Size matters... it all boils down to a question of perspective.
I have to say I really enjoyed this post, but what I enjoyed even more is how you put the words "Size Matters" in bold. For some reason, that made me laugh. :)
Thanks Nightowl!
Jeanette, I'm always happy to make you laugh!
We have wolf spiders here the size of saucers (well, not quite). You can actually hear them walking. I try not to kill them, but sometimes they get whomped, especially if I find one on my clothing.
Josie
Josie,
You've posted so many beautiful pics of your fair city, making me long to visit. Yeah, now, not so much.
I am not afraid of spiders at all unless one takes me by surprise. I actually think they are kind of cute.
Gary,
Eeeeeeeew.
Why would a bunch of astrophysicists try to land a craft on Enceladus? Why would you be afraid of squirrels? Why? Why? Why? Why even mention Enceladus, an active moon of Saturn???
Geewits!
You're post has stirred up some controversy!
LGS is sad that you're afraid of squirrels and Josie's city (my old city) is suddenly not looking so nice, eh?
What a funny post! I have to say, I agree with you about some of those questions, nothing is as black and white as those queries imply, are they.
Also?
If I lived close to you, I'd be happy to save you from spiders (my method is to scoop them up and deliver them to safety outside.)
Come to think of it, you might not appreciate that, knowing they are just outside, sure to be looking for a way back in!
Let's say I'm in a room with a bunch of astrophysicists and they are trying to figure out how to land a craft on Enceladus
Well, in that case I would say GET THE HELL OUT OF THE ROOM! You're just getting in the way, being a problem!
Just teasing! :) Funny post!
wow, squirrel, I didn't know you had such a fear of space exploration.
tai,
I can't believe you actually touch spiders. I do that with crickets, though.
dan,
How do you know I'm not in there sharpening pencils and making sandwiches and coffee?
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