Eleven Dollars and Change

My Meals on Wheels drive started out this morning with my driving by a landscaper dude who was on a riding mower right by the street and hearing a rock hit the side of my truck. I'm guessing the irritation of that made me clench my thighs together. Well I was holding a plastic bottle of water between my legs which I had opened but not drunk from and I apparently compressed the bottle enough to make the water gush out the top and onto my jeans. Not a great start. The next fun thing was when I reached the first apartment complex. This is the one I mentioned sometime back that has reserved parking and the only unmarked spaces are in Cleveland. By now I was just parking on the main road and walking into the complex. The walk is about the same as if you walked out your front door, crossed the street and walked two houses down. If you lived in a normal house, that is, and not on some rolling 8 acre estate with a 400 yard driveway. So I'm holding my tray in my left hand, raise my right hand to knock and happen to glance down at the tray. My first thought was, "Oh no! I brought the wrong cookie!" I was looking at the chocolate/chocolate chip cookie which was for "regular" clients and this lady was "diet." So then I see the diet cookie and think, "Oh, I just put both on there." But something wasn't right. THEN I noticed there was no hamburger bun. Because you know how easy it is to confuse a large chocolate/chocolate chip cookie for a hamburger bun. So then I had to walk all the way back to my truck and then back to the apartment. And did I mention my foot is still not 100% healed and does not care for shoes? I was at least glad that I noticed all this BEFORE I knocked.

Last Wednesday I went to Friday's for lunch. I didn't realize how long it had been since I was there until I complimented Sarah on her new hair color and she said it had been like that for nearly a year. Well she let slip that Chad, my favorite Bennigan's bartender, was back on Wednesday lunch, so I went there today. I love (LOVE) their ribs.

In my last post I mentioned how my brain has some sort of First Glance Dyslexia. I was going to count my cash today at Bennigan's and when I pulled my money out of my pocket, two ones were folded together exactly as in the picture above (which is an actual scan) and my brain said "Eleven dollars." Another example is a large sign at the intersection of Denton Highway and Watauga road (or Mid-Cities boulevard - geez I HATE streets that change their names every couple of miles). When I first looked at that sign, I thought it said, "Push For Cash." So I was sitting at the light thinking, "What the hell does that mean?" Of course, when I looked at the sign again it said, "Posh Car Wash." This has been happening to me for at least 30 years and is usually very amusing. I'm going to try to start documenting them.

I think it''s odd that I've never heard of this before. I wonder if it's a documented thing and has a scientific name? Speaking of things that may be unique to me, I realized that in all my years of reading and hearing about people's pet peeves, I have never seen mine mentioned. I'll call it The Door Stop. It's when you are walking into a public building and the people just in front of you walk through the doorway and stop. TWO INCHES IN!! Oh My God. That drives me completely insane. And people do it ALL THE TIME! The worst sites are restaurants and department stores. I notice it is particularly bad in touristy places. I can't for the life of me figure out what these people must be thinking. "Okay, I'm in. Must stop moving." or "Oh I better freeze here in the doorway in case I need to bolt." It's also a close relative to people stopping suddenly on a busy sidewalk or in a busy mall, which I guess could be called The Sudden Walk Stop.

If you learned anything from this post I hope it was: Do not stop in doorways! Well, and two ones is not eleven dollars and a chocolate/chocolate chip cookie is not a hamburger bun. But you probably knew those last two.